I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
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