I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
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He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
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