I don't usually arrange sex via text message
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
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