I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
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