dear santa what can i do with your candy cane?
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
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