my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
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