my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
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