I'm going to jail i love you
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
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well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
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Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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