11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
My boob is missing a layer of skin
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize