your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
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