new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
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