Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
We need to rekindle our bromance
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
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