too bad you live with your parents still
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Somewhere out there, on several phones belonging to strangers, exists a video of me rapping Baby Got Back on stage in four inch heels that I stole from the drag queen. Also I made out with the chick with the octopus tattoo.
You have the best birthdays
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize