i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
Why did I wake up with "How to masturbate" on my youtube search bar?
You told us you forgot how, and started to cry.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
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