The maid of honor just puked.
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
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