So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
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I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
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He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
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