dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
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