I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize