and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
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