No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
third nipple confirmed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
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