Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
My vagina is very pro this idea
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
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