I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
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I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
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