sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize