Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize