so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
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