Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Randomize