i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
You made out with two different species that night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Never underestimate the power of titties
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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