I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize