I heard we made out
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
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