I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize