Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
