when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
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