And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
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I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
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I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
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