you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
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