you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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