there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
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