thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
Randomize