I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
In America we eat man semen.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
Randomize