I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Randomize