Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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