I hope mine doesn't look like that
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
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