Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
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