yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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