Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
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