I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
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