Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize