I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
Do vagina's smell?
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize