Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
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He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
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You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize