Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
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