is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize